Tuesday, August 14, 2007

In the HOOD

I saw Dawn French interviewing Victoria Wood on the telly.

Predictably Dawn was doing most of the talking. 'Jennifer' she said 'goes to the hairdressers, sits down and says ... Don't chat to me - just do my hair…’ Dawn confessed that she spent anxious hours before her appointments thinking of witty anecdotes to entertain the stylist. This quite endeared me to Dawn.
Victoria didn't get a word in.

Since emerging from a hairdressers years ago looking like Leo Sayer, I find having my hair done very scary.

But, at my local tonsorial parlour, we have Natalie whose chat is unmissable.

Unfortunately she can't talk without waving her hands in the air. Obviously this is not good for a hairdresser and drives me mad as I sit tensely waiting for the next snip or blow.
Whatever I want to know about the inhabitants of our flats she will tell me - I don’t even have to ask.
Example:
‘Anne's still depressed She’s cancelled a couple of times on the last minute. Mind you, I can sympathise with those panic attacks. Last month I hyperventilated in the middle of a perm.’
Victoria Wood could find enough material here to last her for the next 10 years.
We compete with anecdotes about local celebs. I can never win as the Gallaghers and Max Beesley used to be regular visitors to her mum’s house.
I only have the Oranges and a mate who used to teach Kevin off Corrie.

Perhaps I should stick with the vibrator.


KAZ

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20 Comments:

Blogger ziggi said...

It would probably be more satisfying if the motor and shaft imparted vibration to the curlee as opposed to the curler - she just doesn't look like she's enjoying it much. Nicely plucked eyebrows though.

8:54 am  
Blogger garfer said...

We used to have barbers, now we have to tolerate unisex hairdressers. It's worse than going to the dentist.

I have hobnobbed with Eric Sykes and Ken Dodd.

10:08 am  
Blogger Geoff said...

I've never seen Max Beesley but apparently he's played percussion with Take That.

Gary makes a heavier sound than Little Mark.

1:24 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

I've always been afraid of the way hairdressers make you sit about two feet away from the sink while washing your hair, so your head is bent back at a weird angle. People have died because of that you know!

Garfer has hobnobbed with Eric Sykes and Ken Dodd at the barbers? Judging by their hairdoes, the stylists can't be much good!

2:00 pm  
Blogger Murph said...

Curlee used to be in Corrie didn't he?

Maybe I'm thinking of Curlee Watts from East Enders.

Shoot me, shoot me, I'm slowing you all down!

3:33 pm  
Blogger tony said...

what is it about hairdressers & "Holidays"? & "The Weather"? ..........but mustnt complain ,Ive found the best Blokes Hairdresser (NATHAM in HEBDEN BRIDGE) ever!I even now go for "Impulse-Haircuts" he's so good............only £6 !A bargin!!!
i dont know anybody famous :(

6:07 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Ziggi:
Hmm yes I agree about the eyebrows.

Unfortunately - she can see that bloke in the mirror which is seriously interfering with her vibrational pleasures.

Garfer:
Equal ops and all that.

I think Ken Dodd must have used the vibrating curling iron.

Geoff;
Correct - I also heard that he played footie for Natalie's brother's team ...etc. etc. etc...

Betty;
Exactly. At least at the dentist you recline comfortably and look much the same when you emerge into the world again.

Murph:
Yes. That was Mr Watts.
Who? This is an East Enders free zone.
Take your time - we love you anyway.

6:11 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Hi Tony - you sneaked in when I wasn't looking.
Last time, the girl who washed my hair asked me twice where I was going on holiday.
My second reply wasn't so polite.

6:15 pm  
Blogger Old Wom Tigley said...

My hair 'Waved' good-by years ago.. Another great post Kaz.

6:50 pm  
Anonymous NiC said...

Ah yes... hairdressers.

I just wish my hair would stop growing right about now as it looks how I want it to.

But it doesn't. By the time I go and get it cut it will look nothing like I want it to so they'll have no idea what it should look like. And a right joker my barber is...I think he counts a haircut as a failure if he hasn't made you laugh just as he's about to cut a very important bit.

PS: The hairdressers/barbers I go to used to be frequented by another of your blogroll I seem to recall. Oh yes.

8:10 pm  
Blogger Roses said...

Where do you put the batteries?

Mind you, you'd think she'd look a touch more animated if it was doing a good job.

8:23 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Wom:
Don't worry - 'bald is the new wave'.

NiC:
You put it so well. My hair looks great - but I might have a hol or a 'do' coming up in a week. If I go for a cut I look awful in a week - if I don't I look awful in a week.
There should be an anti growth spray that fixes it just at that right moment.

I'm wondering which one on the blogroll.
Is it Betty?

Roses:
Exactly - but I think it was that guy's moustache that she could see in the mirror - ugh!

6:38 am  
Blogger stitchwort said...

As the Gallaghers and Max Beesley are "celebs" I've never heard of, they could visit here and I'd be none the wiser.

I once cheerily greeted a face I knew when walking up a street in Durham - it was the then Archbishop of Canterbury.

8:27 am  
Anonymous NiC said...

Nope, not Betty.....thought that's warmish listwise :)

11:12 am  
Blogger Arabella said...

I still miss my San Francisco hairdresser - Cheyenne. Aww, he was fab.

3:29 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Stitch:
What about the Oranges?

But for celebs the Archbishop takes some beating.

I wonder where he gets his hair cut?

NiC:
Could be Gareth - though I think he's shaved all his off.

Arabella:
Cheyenne - how romantic.

7:19 pm  
Blogger stitchwort said...

Oranges - hmm - didn't I see them in the greengrocer's.

(Not quite sure about that apostrophe)

8:52 am  
Anonymous NiC said...

Colder.

10:06 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Stitch:
Only greengrocer's' know the secret of the apostrophe.

NiC:
Beth's a Northern gal. Arabella's from Texas. I don't know Beki too well but I think she's from Yorkshire.
It's a mystery.

3:28 pm  
Blogger Liz said...

There are other people who hate the hairdressers! I am not alone!

6:17 pm  

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