Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Poodle


I popped into 'Help the Aged' yesterday.

And ..... before you say it ... NO ... I wasn't looking for Help. They'd reduced all their videos to 50p - who could resist??

As I walked through the door - I was greeted by one of the assistants who said ....

"You look like a poodle"

I was a little shaken I'll tell you. Wouldn't you be? I know the girl wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer and she was seriously lacking in social skills - but still.

After pretending to look through the dusty dresses and dog eared paperbacks and trying to give an appearance of uncaring nonchalance, I escaped, rushed home and google imaged "poodle"

I was distraught. I was looking for clues.


Not this - I haven't been a brunette for a some time now.

Amazingly I found a website for other victims of poodle accusation here. I am not alone. My fellow sufferer is called a Bichon Frisé.

It was a windy day and my hair (shabby blonde at the moment) was sticking upwards and outwards. I was wearing a sort of trench coat with the collar tuned up in a cool Eric Cantona sort of way (OK pathetic I know).

Could this have resembled the poodle's shape?

Then I remembered that (like me) many poodles don't go to the poodle parlour.

How about this?

Come on KAZ - Get over yourself - please.

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59 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm - I expect it was just a reference to your being windblown...

Would shake me too, especially as I'm more of a cat person. :-).

10:49 pm  
Blogger Rimshot said...

Accept it as a compliment. Poodles, when done up properly are a lovely sight to behold. As, I'm sure, are you; regardless of your state of 'done-upness'.

10:59 pm  
Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

I think that the comment would not have been made had you refrained from peeing on the floor.

12:01 am  
Blogger The Mistress said...

Was size an issue?

Standard? Toy? Miniature?

6:26 am  
Blogger Tom said...

Lol of laughs at these comments as well as the post Kaz..

I have but one thing to say to you Kaz.. " Shackle-razzle-futzal-craz"

http://www.poster.net/anonymous/anonymous-muttley-5001058.jpg

8:15 am  
Blogger Dave said...

Nope. I can think of nothing to say on this subject. I'm sure Murph will have some knowledgeable comment though.

8:19 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Diddums:
Thanks for the reassurance.
I'd much rather look like a slinky cat that a poodle.

Rimshot:
You are so kind.
An elegant coiffure is not really 'moi'
Though I can do a great Amy Winehouse beehive if called upon.

Vicus:
Sorry - I couldn't find a lamp post.

mj:
As you know - size is always an issue.
Miniature is me.

Wom:
I was never any good at languages - but - now I can speak 'Muttley'!

Dave:
It's a wise man who knows when to say nowt!

9:29 am  
Blogger Geoff said...

Maybe you shouldn't have called their books dog-eared.

I'd rather be called a poodle than a bichon frise. John Steinbeck had a lovely poodle.

10:57 am  
Blogger Mopsa said...

I once won a prize for being the owner that most looks like their dog. Mopsa is, as you might know, a Bernese Mountain Dog. I am therefore big, with long shaggy hair, boisterous of temperament, very loving and when freshly bathed, rather nice to know. Yup, that's me.

11:02 am  
Blogger Tameside Eye said...

And charities wonder why no one goes into their shops anymore - it must be the staff!

2:52 pm  
Blogger Arabella said...

There is something worse than being called a poodle. It's referring to ones animal pet as a baby.

For the common sense approach to the staffing of charity shops take a quick look at this editorial:

http://anglicansonline.org/

(It's safe to go here, trust me I'm an Anglican)

Meanwhile I'm off to purchase an animal, stick it in a dress and push it around in a baby pram, lined.

3:51 pm  
Blogger stitchwort said...

Must have been the leather collar with metal studs that did it.
Or perhaps the cold wet nose?

4:01 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Geoff:
I would hate to be called a bichon frise - but I've often been called a bich ... or something very similar.
Charlie?

Mopsa:
Congratulations (I think).
Now go and have a bath so I can get to know you better.

Tameside Eye:
Hello - and YES - the shop was in Tameside.
I think this particular one does a bit of 'Care in the Community'.

Arabella:
The Anglican site refers to 'employers of persons who might not otherwise have been employable'. Sounds about right.

Don't buy a cat - they'd soon tell you where to get off!

Stitchwort:
Yeah - now you're talking and that certainly describes my nose - even in summer.

7:35 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

Perhaps she was collecting material for an art project, and a hidden camera was recording people's reactions to her announcement that they looked like a poodle.

Either that, or you should stop having the '80's perms.

8:29 pm  
Blogger Rog said...

I'm here! I think you may be a Poodle Faker, Kaz.

And videos are so last week.

8:33 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Betty:
Does this mean I'll be a reality TV star - a bit like Jane Goody.

Pass me the curling tongs and look out for the launch of my new fragrance - exclusive to 'Pets 'r Us'

Murph:
Ah - but according to your erudite phrase book (where on earth do you find them?) - I am a gigolo.

Could be worse?

I'm starting a retro fashion - VHS now - next year Betamax.

9:41 pm  
Blogger The [Cherry] Ride said...

Thanks for the laughs. I am still laughing as I type this.

10:29 pm  
Blogger Zig said...

I've heard that the good thing about Poodles is that they don't moult, so count your blessings!

7:51 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

[Cherry]ride:
Glad to hear it.

Ziggi:
So you'll never see a poodle with a combover than.

11:23 am  
Blogger Romeo Morningwood said...

Dare I ask about the fancy schmancy tufts of curls on your hips to keep your joints warm and cozy whilst swimming in l'eau froid?

1:38 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

HE:
What are you suggesting??

My hips are as smooth and beautiful as a baby's derriere.

9:59 am  
Blogger tony said...

Maybe, she just wanted to be your Pal & Chum ?
Just goes to show, things arnt always what they appear.........

2:07 pm  
Blogger Lubin said...

What a horrible shop assistant. Would you like me to get one of my rough neighbours to put a brick through her window?

4:01 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Tony:
A lamb being sold as a poodle - I could understand it if they'd claimed it was a 'bichon frise'

"A leading Japanese actress said her 'poodle' refused to eat dog food" - sounds just like most of the dogs I've known...

Lubin:
You've just done a course in negotiating skills haven't you?
I can tell!

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