Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Penis ENVY

Our much respected crown prince is a man of infinite taste and refinement. Chas really hates high buildings that alter the skyline of London.

So - he won't be pleased to know that Richard Rodgers is soon to erect a cheese grater to add to his gherkin. Charles preferred it when he wrote 'The King and I' with Oscar Hammerstein

Manchester is trying to compete. We now have The Beetham Tower.

It is home to the Manchester Hilton - they asked Paris to open it, but had to settle for Max Beesley.

Here is a pic I took last night as I drove home through Openshaw. You get a similar view from Rusholme and every approach to the city.

You can tell it wasn't designed by a woman can't you?

The architect (Ian Simpson) obviously has a very small penis.

Ian lives in an apartment at the top - the highest living space in UK. You can see Blackpool Tower from his penthouse. It'd be a lot quicker to drive to Blackpool, but Ian probably wouldn't like mixing with the day trippers .

The building whistles during windy weather (262 Hertz - middle C) which can be a nuisance as Coronation Street is filmed nearby. The producers had to introduce extra background noise - e.g. another fight between Gail and Eileen - to cover this up.

But that's OK for the residents of Hulme and Whalley Range because the tower has seriously interfered with their TV reception anyway.

So ... do you agree with our esteemed Prince - or what?



Blogger I, still, ♥ the views said...

crikey - he looks a bit of a twat in that photo. . . should have ditched the sunglasses

9:09 am  
Blogger I, still, ♥ the views said...

(erm, dare I ask why there are words on your television screen. . .)(no, sorry, thought not)

9:12 am  
Blogger Betty said...

I probably agree with HRH (which doesn't happen very often!) Those buildings just look out of place with everything around them. I grew up with an enormous chimney overshadowing our garden when it was stuck on top of the bakery at the end of our street. That's probably prejudiced me. Nothing to do with my having an enormous penis, although I'm sure the Prince Of Wales has one, hem hem.

11:09 am  
Blogger Liz said...

Wow, you've got a posh telly!

I like some of the modern buildings (the Gherkin for instance) although I'm not sure about that tall skinny one in Manchester there.

I think Prince Charles is Grumpy Old Man In Chief to a nation of moaners.

11:41 am  
Blogger Murph said...

Don't take any notice of Chaz,
He's a miserable sod, an annoying 'un,
The penis mightier than the sword Kaz,
If Manchester can't Beetham, Join 'em.

12:18 pm  
Blogger Dave said...

Gosh. A building more than two storeys high. You don't get ones like that in Norfolk.

12:22 pm  
Anonymous NiC said...

I rather like it. A shame about the whistling, although I don't watch Corrie any more (in fact I don't even know who Eileen is).

I would think Chazza's hat whistles too. What a fine advert for republicanism.

1:10 pm  
Blogger Geoff said...

So that's why David Platt ran amuck - to drown out the whistling.

That building looks a bit silly on its own. It needs some friends.

1:15 pm  
Blogger Roses said...

As a penis substitute it works. The building, like a penis is not exactly a thing of beauty.

It seems to stand there and think that was the achievement.

At least the building can whistle independently.

3:21 pm  
Blogger stitchwort said...

Our future king, a whistling penis, Coronation Street...?

The answer to your question has to be - What?

4:03 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

View 1:
Yes - shades and traditional headresses is not a good combination.

View 2:
Subtitles - they just appeared on digital one day and I've quite got to like them.

I bet that enormous chimney has shaped your personality in ways you can't even begin to imagine.
Freud would love it.

Yeah - it's a bit bling isn't it.

It really is annoying as it takes your eye where you don't want it to go.

(grins) Why didn't I think of those puns? They would improve the post no end.

Well that shows that the men of Norfolk must be very well endowed.

I'm getting fed up with it too. Eileen is the best character - she used to be in Dinner Ladies.

Your 'ad for republicanism' comment sums it all up.

Exactly - Manchester is never going to compete with New York is it?
It just looks annoying.

Manchester is famous for it's imposing Victorian buildings.
I'm in favour of moving on - but we still need some 'beauty' in our architecture.

All human life is here.
Re your answer - I asked for that didn't I?

5:17 pm  
Blogger Hyde DP said...

personally I think it is a bit of a monstrocity - have I spelt that right? - looks too much like a target to me and makes me nervous.

6:14 pm  
Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

I don't care. Don't care much what stuff looks like, and don't notice it much.
Scurra - temporary member of the bloke's party.

If I was forced to have my druthers I would get rid of the fucking eyesore in the Constitution Hill/Birdcage Walk area and turn it into a people's woodland.

6:26 pm  
Blogger Old Wom Tigley said...

How can anyone who sleeps with Camilla Toilet-Bowls say what is ugly or not. I like this tower and others like it.. I love the Bee Of The Bang... but then I do not have to live near them... I like to go to the hill just up the road from me and look across at Manchester.. I enjoy the view.. from there. Manchester and any other city and town is much better to look at from afar... where you can't smell it or hear it. Give me lungs full of freshly spead manure than a whiff of city centre any day.

7:02 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

I always think of 9.11 when I see it.

I understood the first paragraph and research told me what 'having your druthers' meant.
But as an underprivileged unsophistcated provincial - I haven't a clue about Birdcage walk etc.

Like the new avatar - saw it at Gerald's place this morning.
I love the B of the Bang as well.
I grew up with the smell of manure which is OK.
But I draw the line at silage.

8:03 pm  
Blogger Mopsa said...

I don't give a stuff about the wingnut or what he thinks, but I do agree with you, Kaz!

8:12 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

But do you mean about the buildings or the silage - see previous comment?

8:16 pm  
Blogger tony said...

No, I dont Like It.....& Chaz is a silly spoilt bugger.........Just Wait ' till Al-Qaeda get to hear about it!And/Or David Platt Gets His Pilot's Licence!!!

9:00 pm  
Blogger MJ said...

Subtitles or not, I still wouldn't be able to understand a word that Ashley says.

5:50 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Many a true word spoken in jest.

You're not missing much!

11:21 am  
Blogger Kimberly said...

I think Prince Charles' deprived psychosis, sexually speaking runs pretty deep and that his roots are showing.
I'll be willing to bet that the Twin Towers and the Empire State Building were both designed by a woman, which probably explains why men who suffer from a severe "down below" inferiority complex always want to knock them down.

8:47 pm  
Blogger The Poet Laura-eate said...

Actually the good Prince's views on architecture are about ALL I have in common with him.

And I featured Lord Roger's gherkin debacle in a former posting 'Modern Architects Deny Allegations of Masturbatory Fantasy'

Not that I mind imaginative modern architecture in the right context (ie all together and not spoiling the historic bits). If they put it all in Milton Keynes, I'd be perfectly happy!

11:55 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

"down below" inferiority complex - what a lovely way of putting it.

In Paris they've mostly got them all in one place except for one monstrosity (Tour Montparnasse) which stands all by itself looking stupid and ugly.

7:37 pm  
Blogger Donnnn said...

Wo! What a ridiculous edifice..
where is the proportionality and scale referencing of the surroundings..
that is whack!

He could have just had a penis extension and spared everybody else from the architectural extension of his penis..
that's what those little red convertibles are for you twat!

8:23 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

The 23rd floor sticks out by 4m and it has a glass floor so you can see down to the ground below your feet.
*shivers with fear*

8:57 pm  
Blogger Gordie said...

I'm still trying to cleanse my mind of the sentence "they asked Paris to open it" (you mean she said no ?) I'm sure she's settled for less than Max Beesley.

A lot of men look down on their penises. It's difficult not to, as Ernest Hemingway said to F. Scott Fitzgerald.

1:36 pm  

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