Saturday, July 12, 2008

Things I Hate about Spain


I love Spain but there are some things that really annoy me.

1: The Noise:
The Spanish don't do quiet.

Bob the Builder or Jordi the Joiner starts his banging every morning at eight o'clock. Fair enough - but at 8.15 a.m. precisely he stop for his tea break*.

*What's the Spanish equivalent?

2: Siesta

OK, even though Jordi interrupted your sleep, there's still croissants to be eaten, coffee to be drunk and crosswords to be solved.

But, suppose you fancy a day out to broaden the mind - maybe a visit to some Medieval rampart, Romanesque cloister or Visigothic settlement.

By the time you arrive it's shut and the relentless heat is sapping the last drop of life from the mad dogs and English persons in the deserted town square.


Yes - I know birdwatchers should be early risers but I wouldn't make the effort for a Visigoth.

3: Graffiti:

If it exits in Spain it gets covered in graffiti.

Some of it is fabulous, but most of it's crap. The Spanish don't seem to bother - or perhaps they've given up.

The windows of my train from Barcelona were covered in it as were the shelters and place names of all the stations.

Hold on a minute this 'tag' looks familiar.


4: Dinner Time

Sorry señor - I simply can't wait for dinner at 10pm.
By this time I am unlikely to be at the table.

But you may find me underneath it.

KAZ

32 Comments:

Blogger garfer said...

Do they do builders bum like our classy British bricklayers?

Not that we'll have any jobs for bricklayers soon. Tent city here we come.

5:27 pm  
Blogger Roses said...

It sounds ghastly. Especially the hot builders...

You must come home immediately. It's wet, cool, drab, with very rotund builders showing off their hairy backsides.

I insist.

7:30 pm  
Blogger Geoff said...

We've always heard early banging in Spain when we've been. And the moans that accompany it!

I think there are always builders wherever you go on holiday. Unless you go to a nice quiet village, then you get a ghost horse.

Betty's good at drawing but I've never seen her tag before. I didn't know she lived so dangerously in her spare time.

7:40 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

That first photo would be enough for me to forgive any of the other things.

Although I'm with you on the dinner time. Except if you get up at 11am it's perfect.

*raises glass of red Pierre Norrelle* cheers!

8:52 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

hey it's almost 10pm and I'm more than a bit tipsy!

8:52 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

Are we eating soon?

I'm getting hungry

8:53 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

tacos con carne y tortilla chips con guacamole y mucho margaritas por favor.

Ay! Carrambra!

8:54 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

The other thing I notice when I'm in Spain is that the refuse vans seem to turn up to noisily empty the bins at about seven o'clock in the morning. As opposed to Britain, of course, where the refuse vans now turn up about three times a year if you're lucky.

You're right though, I do like to indulge in a bit of tagging, but only when I'm on holiday.

9:03 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

or in Napoli where they don't turn up at all Betty

9:27 pm  
Blogger SL said...

I love you. But ffs, get used to it!!!

11:37 pm  
Blogger Donnnnn said...

My Word!
You should open a finishing school to put a little polish on those ghastly little barbarians...
AND..
if it was as awful as you make it out to be you most certainly would not be going back there every two weeks now would you?!

3:05 am  
Blogger MJ said...

Could you not invite the builder in for a stiff one?

5:33 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Garfer:
'Tent city' - sounds very camp to me.

Roses:
I'm sure you know what's best for me.
But perhaps I'll stick it out for a little longer ... if that's OK with you.

Geoff:
There'd be a queue for a bit of 'early banging' with that builder in the photo.

Can you ever really know another person??

Pete:
I chose it specially for you.
Cheers!

'tacos con carne y tortilla chips con guacamole y mucho margaritas por favor.' Sounds more Mexican that Catalunyan
It's Calamares and chips as usual tonight.

Betty:
Those refuse bins on the corner of every street seem to work well as long as you don't have to sleep nearby.
I love watching the sexy women in their skimpy clothes and stilettos walking out the door carrying smelly bags of rubbish.

I think it was 'Mademoiselle Betty' as I saw the train at the last station before France.

Pete:
Ah Napoli - I wonder why we always Anglicise it to Naples - not half as romantic.

sl:
ff?
It could mean very loud or be short for graffiti.

I'm a fan of the colourful arty stuff on walls - but when you can't see out of the train window and every signpost is covered, it's a bit much.

I love you too X

Donnn:
Coming back every two weeks?
But we're all Europeans now so we must make the effort.
Otherwise we'll be accused of being 'Little Englanders' or regretting the fall of the Empire.

mj:
I did but he said he insisted on bringing his boyfriend with him.

10:53 am  
Blogger tony said...

I recognise that Bloke from My recent stag-Do In Benidorm! He missed the flight home....we all wondered what had happened to him!

12:22 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

True, but they haven't had their trash picked up for 6 months or so.

I don't eat calamares, but I'll have some chips then por favor.

3:02 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Tony:
He seems to have lost his hard hat.

Pete:
Not even Calamares a la Romana i.e. in batter with millions of calories?

6:39 am  
Blogger Roses said...

Calamares? Iddy biddy bits of squid battered and deep fried? Although, I have tried my best and experimented with different dishes...they still taste like deep fried rubberbands to me. I'll have the chips though, with mayo. Yum. And the bottle of wine.

7:40 am  
Blogger Murph said...

So Spain is noisy, vacant, over-drawn and pissed? Sounds like someone I'm familiar with already.

12:13 pm  
Blogger tony said...

...............and his beer-belly!

4:45 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

Sorry, I try to keep my intake of disgusting sea creatures to a minimum.

I recently was introduced to onion rings. Now those I'd eat.

5:42 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Roses:
Hmm - 'Deep fried rubber bands' is a fair comparison.
But I've really aquired the taste now - I usually forget the
chips and just eat them with mayo and bread ..... probably about now - not 10pm.

Vina Sol OK for you?

Murph:
Do you refer to the long suffering Mr Drew P?
OK - but I didn't know he was noisy?

Tony:
.... and his whiskers.

Pete:
I'm beginning to see you in a different light. Chips and
onion rings are both junk food and you'll be getting fat.

Bet Kylie doesn't eat either.

6:24 pm  
Anonymous Arabella said...

I can't be waiting for dinner at
10. My body clock is more French than Spanish - sit down at 7 and probably get to coffee by 10.
A noisy and beautiful people, the Spanish; perhaps after enduring forty odd years of fascism propped up by Roman Catholicism, its GOOD TO SHOUT?

11:29 pm  
Blogger Old Wom Tigley said...

Sorry I've not visited you this last week or so.. and thank you for still visiting me and being kind enough to leave me comments.. kind comments as well.. not one shouting at me to get off my backside and visit..

I'm happy to see that Spain can get you angry... I've just had a face to face with one of Tamesides finest Bin Truck Drivers... who insisted I park my land rover illegally on the pavement.. He took great offence at being told NO.. ha! still he will have the next two days to calm down while they are on strike. BTW... Bin was not emptied so I think he won..:O)

11:01 am  
Blogger CyberPete said...

I know, Kylie has to be told to eat.

Her assistant Leanne makes sure she eats at appointed times. Well, it used to be that way before her ordeal.

5:07 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Arabella:
The French are so restrained in comparison with the Spanish.
Have you read that book about why French Women don't get fat? They have a great attitude to food - but unfortunately many Spanish women seem to be tending towards the chubby these days.

Wom/Tom:
I just sooo want you to be fit and well.

I'm sure that shouting at the bin man isn't good for you. He may have won but you had the moral highground.

Pete:
I suppose if you are worshipped by millions you don't need comfort food!

7:20 am  
Blogger tony said...

Oui Lass ! Vous êtes correct !

9:39 am  
Anonymous Arabella said...

You mean the book about one rich woman swanning about the chateaux living on watery leek consomme?!

9:50 am  
Blogger ziggi said...

why don't French women get fat then? - tell us and save us having to read the book.

Is it because they don't sell Cadbury's fruit and nut in France?

11:59 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Tony:
Well I do actually read your blog y'know.

Arabella:
She was certainly rich - she sold Champagne in the US.

The soup may be what she ate to lose the weight in the first place.

Most of the book is about how to stop gaining it again by eating small amounts of delicious food that you have chosen with loving care.

So a meal may consist of fromage de chevre, sole meuniere, entrecote, creme caramel and a rich Burgundy
with cafe and a choc to follow - but each part in strict moderation.

Ziggi:
See above.
It demands an obsession with the food itself but not the amounts.

Taste is eveything.

You'll never go to McDonalds again.
OK - I know you never would.

4:25 pm  
Blogger CyberPete said...

Why do I eat comfort food then?

Hmmm

I had a thought why do you keep going back to Catalunya? Why not somewhere else. Do you have some secret lover there, or lovers or do they pay you to come so you call tell everyone about what a fabulous place it is?

5:50 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Pete:
It's not the lovers it's the birds.

I've travelled all over Spain, France and the rest of Europe and this place has everything. Cities, beaches, wildlife .....

But I am getting lazy. I still haven't been to the states.

5:55 pm  
Blogger The Poet Laura-eate said...

I've never seen the point of abroad.

Does that make me zeno-something-or-other?

Not that this country's great, I grant you.

5:48 pm  

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