Monday, September 08, 2008

Holiday Outfits (Part 2)

I saw a woman on Girona Station carrying a Morrison's carrier bag.

How could she?

I remember cringing with every step as my ex husband escorted me round Venice in his 'Bradford Jazz Festival' tee shirt.

Why does Kev insist on wearing his hideous Manchester Velodrome shirt when I'm trying to look sophisticated and cosmopolitan? I suppose I should be proud and patriotic after the Olympics - but just look at the thing.


It's not that I'm ashamed of being British.

Not at all.

I'm very proud to be associated with a nation that selects a lollipop lady and a red bus as symbols of excellence.

Don‘t forget, we won the world cup in 1966 and we beat Andorra (186th in the Fifa world rankings) on Saturday. What more can one ask?

Ok I'll admit it - I like it when people think I'm French. The French for 'Skinny Shortarse' is petite and they consider it as a compliment.

The French are so chic and stylish like this:


No sorry - I mean this

Spot the shortarse.

KAZ

28 Comments:

Blogger Steve said...

Zank 'eaven's for leetle girls...

7:30 am  
Blogger Dave said...

Only the French could get away with wearing a big triangular hat like that.

Napoleon was quite short.

8:21 am  
Blogger Malc said...

Is Sarkozy developing into a kind of Gallic Boris Johnson? He looks stupider every time I see him.

Mind you, he's the big fromage of France and married to a supermodel - so not so stupid.

8:44 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Steve:
OOh what a sexy French accent you have.

Dave:
'Big triangular hat' - that's very good.
It took me a minute!

Malc:
Or a grosse legume as I read the other day.

What next?
Boris and Agyness?

9:19 am  
Blogger Gordie said...

Am I supposed to be looking at the Hungarian shortarse or the Italian shortarse?

Poor ol' Sarko's got a bulge in his crotch that's stopping him putting his heel on the floor. Man, those jeans are tight.

10:00 am  
OpenID Arabella said...

I'm going to be Contrary Mary and say that Sarkozy might be French but he isn't chic and that Carla is Italian and has a face like a weasel.

2:06 pm  
Blogger garfer said...

Quite attractive as weasels go though. Unfortunately she thinks she has musical talent.

Which she doesn't.

2:47 pm  
Blogger MJ said...

I'm pleased to see that even the French can't rid their jeans of upper thigh crease.

*feels superior for a fleeting moment*

3:59 pm  
Blogger ziggi said...

I didn't realise you were short Kaz - I just thought you were standing a long way away!

5:36 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Gordie:
Good point - Audrey Tautou would have been a better choice.
I have to admit that I also noticed the bulge - perhaps it's where he keeps his Camembert.

Arabella (Mary):
Some weasels can look quite cute (I checked with Google images).
But that nude pic is about as sexy as a stick of celery.

Garfer:
Do you like the tall slender type?
I thought you'd be a curves fancier.

mj:
His legs are too short for jeans - and hers are so long a few creases don't matter.

Ziggi:
...and in a hole.

6:30 pm  
Blogger Donnnnn said...

Eetz Pepé Le Pew and Penelope Pussycat and zay are in lurve!

Push in French is poussée, isn't that adorable?

6:31 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Donnn:
OOh la la!
I don't suppose you remember Mrs Slocombe and her poussée.

6:37 pm  
Blogger Gordie said...

I've heard Carla Bruni singing lyrics by Dorothy Parker and WB Yeats and enjoyed 'em.

11:29 pm  
Blogger Midnight said...

I can't believe you posted Frenchies on your blog! I thought you were a true Brit!

11:30 pm  
Blogger I, like the view said...

think I wrote all my comments about this one in the wrong place

something distracted me

7:58 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Gordie:
What next?
Dylan Thomas?

Middy:
Brits are fine except for their food, wine, style, football and 'je ne sais quoi' what else.

View:
Sensuous men?
They must be very young and usually gay or in the closet.

10:28 am  
Blogger Murph said...

You should change the name of this blog to "Petite Mancunian" - you might get a publishing contract.

And loads of comments from the US saying things like "Awww Petite!!! *sighs*... Kev is just sooooo cute in that shirt. (((hugs))) lol :-)".

Perhaps not then.

1:24 pm  
OpenID Arabella said...

Now of course I feel contrite.
The elevation of certain faces or types annoys me though. Most of us are appealing in some way - the raising up of some (think of Jackie Kennedy)who are blessed with ordinary features into a super status bewilders me.
Off to take a laughing pill.

2:27 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Murph:
Or perhaps something like this

But let's not involve Kev - eh?
(((((small restrained pat on back))))))

Arabella:
I will pass your comment on to the weasel.

Yes - we are all appealing in some way.
I propose the elevation of the elderly skinny shortarse to superstar status.

4:00 pm  
Blogger ziggi said...

I'm appealing - bloody cheap tan.

5:21 pm  
Blogger Gordie said...

More of Dodo on BD Trash - evidently the youngest "pensionaire" is a little bit younger than you!

9:35 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Ziggi:
Tee hee!
I geddit.
Was it 'spray on' from B&Q?

Gordie:
Ah the French do love their bande dessinée.
Apparently 'pensionnaire' means lodger in French

7:51 am  
Blogger Gordie said...

Is that 'lodger' as Freemason?

7:55 am  
Blogger stitchwort said...

Is that naked girl suffering from a twisted spine?

Nothing wrong with a Velodrome T-shirt, as long as it's not wrapped round a beer gut.

10:52 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Gordie:
No a pensionnaire is a female - not welcome at the Lodge.

Stitch:
Twiggy used to pose a bit like that in the 60s - but she had the sense to keep her clothes on.

Kev's a bit chubbier than when he used to ride at the velodrome - I don't think Chris Hoy has anything to fear.

5:25 pm  
Blogger The Poet Laura-eate said...

Sadly nagging men never works. And trying to 'inspire' them seldom works either.

I don't know what the answer is, though on the bright side their dress sense does help to act as a form of contraception where sexual continence is lacking on their part!

6:05 pm  
Blogger Flaming Nora said...

Hey, there's nowt wrong wi' Morrisons carrier bags, Girona or not.

12:46 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Laura:
Well I've heard of looking on the bright side - but you seem to have got it down to a fine art.

Nora:
Better than bloody Waitrose any day.

8:38 am  

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