Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Everybody Lies.

Friend B aka Trudy Styler/Lady Penelope/Lesley sneaked out from under her glittering chandeliers last night to meet me in Didsbury for early doors.

Mine's a Sauvignon - hers is a Chardonnay.

Her opening words were 'Kaz - I need your opinion on this jacket and my new hairstyle'.

I recalled an article I'd read last week about lying. Apparently most people lie three times during a 10 minute conversation. Pete Doherty confessed that the last lie he told was 'not guilty'.

I'm naturally very truthful - probably because I'm afraid of being caught out. But this situation was desperate.

The Jacket:
Brown with big white dots, short sleeves, slender waist and huge shoulder pads.

I know. I know. Shoulder pads are back in fashion - but not like these. These were not Kate and Agyness shoulder pads, they were definitely Krystal and Alexis.

These shoulder pads are alive and well on the Costa del Sol but not in South Manchester.

The Hair:

Reminiscent of Rita off Corrie - but this wasn't a wig. It was back combed so you could see the light through it and the back didn't meet with the front. It was red like Rita's but with DIY scarlet streaks.

What would you have done?



Blogger Rog said...

She was lying when she said she "wanted your opinion"!

Oz & Lil lie when they are sleeping.

6:50 pm  
Blogger Rog said...

Yey! 2nd!!!!

6:50 pm  
Blogger savannah said...

how good of a friend is she, sugar? i would no more let my best galpal go out like that than she would me! trust me! xoxox

6:52 pm  
Blogger xl said...

If I were asked, I would say that I don't think it's a flattering look for her.

7:32 pm  
Blogger tony said...

I Think I Would Have Fallen In Love..........

7:39 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

Unpleasant memories of removing American football-type shoulder pads from virtually every dress/top/jacket I bought in the 1980's, then having to replace them with smaller shoulder pads. Hope this isn't going to happen again!

Perhaps your friend is trying to look like that La Roux woman? http://blog.nunocaeiro.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/laroux.jpg

7:47 pm  
Blogger Geoff said...

My mum bought a top from Ted Baker as apparently the retired woman on holiday look is very popular amongst the youngsters today. She had to take it back, of course, like every item of clothing she's bought in the past 10 years.

I model myself on Blake Carrington. Or is it Donald Trump?

8:15 pm  
Blogger Kerrie said...

Oh dear, I wouldn't have lied, if I loved my friend I would have found something nice, anything you can find about it to cling to that actually like,like oh the buttons on that are really sparkley.

9:07 pm  
Blogger Kevin Musgrove said...

I never get asked these questions. Don't know why not.

9:10 pm  
Blogger Scarlet-Blue said...

Oh! This has freaked me out! I've just replied to your comment on my blog - and I hadn't been here first. This isn't a lie. How weird.

9:20 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Yes - but I don't think she knew she was lying.
Oz and Lil are just bad - to the core. I blame the humans.


She's a very good friend - but last time I spoke the truth it didn't go down well.

You are so wise.
I could have said that she should emphasise her petiteness rather than braoden her shoulders.

Are you a Kate or a Krystal man?

Oh yes:
I used to buy old frocks from jumble sales, remove the shoulder pads and stick them into my new clothes with sellotape. They would move from outfit to outfit as the need arose.
I didn't go cold turkey either - but did the shoulder pad reduction like you.

I could have forgiven an innovative hairstyle - but not Rita.

Blake or Donald?
I don't see you with a combover. Perhaps you're more of a JR.

She took me by surprise. I did say the jacket had a nice texture.
But that's called damning with faint praise.

9:21 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

She calls it 'girl talk'.
I call it taking advantage.

I forgot to tick the box - so I'll come over.
I remember using the term 'retro'.

9:24 pm  
Blogger garfer said...

Hints of the Blessed Maggie T in the last photie.

Alan Clark fancied the pants off her, which says it all really.

I'm sticking with my Arthur Scargill comb over. It's always a hit with the lady subscribers to the Socialist Workers Knitwear Gazette.

10:30 pm  
Blogger MJ said...

I am fibbing when I say that Garfer looks hot with that comb over.

4:06 am  
Blogger Steve said...

The truth hurts. And that kind of hurt is best coming from a friend. Alcohol is essential in these situations. Sounds like the situation was primed.

7:16 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

OH Dear - you're a bit right.
Poor friend B there's no hope - unless I buy her a subscription to The Socialist Workers Knitwear Gazette.
She could make herself a nice cardigan.

You did right - he's a sensitive soul.

Although I agree that it's best coming from a friend I couldn't be completely truthful as many of her outfits are similar.
She'd probably have had to chuck out the entire wardrobe or commit suicide.

7:55 am  
Anonymous NiC said...

She sounds very stylish.

I'm lying of course.

Was she ever a Corrie or Dynasty fan? Maybe there's a way out if she was

7:55 am  
Blogger Dave said...

The answer is: 'Do you want my honest opinion, or would you like me to say you look lovely?'

Always works for me. In the sense that I never get asked again.

8:02 am  
Blogger BEAST said...

You just have to use a statement that is iether a good or a bad thing depending on your view point
ie Its very You!

Covers a multitude of sins(Try not to laugh or choke when you say it)

10:24 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

She used to be .......... in the eighties!
No - she must be the only person in Manchester who has never heard of Rita and Mavis.

I haven't got many friends left - so I'd like to keep this one.

You are a born diplomat.
Ever thought of standing for parliament?

10:56 am  
Blogger Tom said...

Laughed and asked had she won the bet.... or told her she looked stunning. I'm not one for holding back with comments.... maybe thats why I have 'no' friends ( sob sob )
Hope this finds all well in Kazland

11:44 am  
Blogger Morton Shadow said...

I used to have legs like that...




11:56 am  
Blogger Roses said...

There's a lot to be said for truth, people always know where they stand with you. Therefore, I always tell the truth to people I can't stand; or friends who piss me off.

There's more to be said for lying like a cheap rug in the face of questions like that. It keeps many a relationship/friendship solid.

Unfortunately, trying to remember which lie you said to whom, is a bit of a bummer, especially if you're as adept at killing off braincells as I.

Tact and diplomacy are two virtues I'd love to acquire. So I am deeply envious of 'that look, is so very you.'

11:57 am  
Blogger Rol said...

Married her.

3:58 pm  
Blogger Steve said...

"She'd probably have had to chuck out the entire wardrobe or commit suicide..."

So a win-win situation for the local charity shops...

7:46 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

I'm your friend Tom - I'll tell you when it's time to stop eating the pies.

Hi Morton:
Legs like the gorgeous Kate.
So - what went wrong?

'Lying like a cheap rug' I must remember that phrase.
I can't lie for the same braincell reason as you - but I have mastered the art of deceit and sitting on the fence with conviction.

Now that's the biggest lie in the comments box - ever!

Now I feel guilty.

9:13 pm  
Blogger Madame DeFarge said...

I think I would have feigned mental abandonment and fainted, thus avoiding either lying or truth telling. I am a moral coward.

9:54 pm  
Blogger I, Like The View said...

if I were Anne Widdicome, I'd say something polite (as you know, since you read the article)

but I'm not - if I were brave I'd probably offer to go with her next time she's off to the salon and the shops

but I'm not - truth is, I only have one friend and she's quite stylish (she's always telling me I need to sort out my wardrobe and get a new hairdresser)

12:05 pm  
Blogger I, Like The View said...

(I've never understood if being "economical with the truth" is considered the same as fibbing)

12:06 pm  
Blogger Arabella said...

A true friend? I'd be brutally honest in my opinion of the jacket. Hair is dangerous though as the poor wench can't change it tomorrow; I'd try something like "You're going to hate me but I think your last look was much more flattering".
After four weeks I'd recommend another stylist.
I don't have many friends. Can't imagine why.

3:13 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

I've worked all my life for 'mental abandonment'.
I wouldn't be wasting it on Lesley

Welcome home - we've missed you.
I'm not brave either. In the end I hummed and haaed and dug myself into a deeper and deeper hole.

You would have squirmed for me.

View 2:
I think it is.
Wasn't it used by one MP to another in the House where you can't accuse someone of lying?
It's like Winston Churchill's 'technological inexactitude'.

She is foolish to ask - but she is a fan of the girls' talk concept. Unfortunately she's got the wrong 'girl'.
Must commit to memory ....
"You're going to hate me but I think your last look was much more flattering".

5:36 pm  
Blogger tony said...

Krystal Rules!

7:23 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

We know it's really Rita that you fancy!

9:25 am  
Blogger Donn said...

Honest? It would depend on how soon we'd meet again..she'd need enough time to cool off.

Wait a minute I'm a guy.
We tell our guy-friends if they look like an idiot in a heart beat!
We've been trained to tell all of our gal-friends they look fabulous or HOT if our significant other isn't in the room.

That's why we never need to worry our little straw filled heads about this stuff :)

1:02 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Methinks you speak with tongue in cheek. I know how you guys like to big each other up - and the sad thing is - you all believe it.
WE like to hear it - but never trust it.

10:31 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"WE like to hear it - but never trust it."

Good one!

I think it's all about the social noises and also about timing; if she has already come out dressed a certain way, she already thinks it's looking good... and so she'll be more upset by a negative view.

If she's trying things on and is asking should she wear that... that's probably the right time to say "mm, I prefer the other dress! It's more your colour."

Not that tactfulness is my forte. :-) Given an unexpected gift I didn't see the point of... "oh." (Puts it down vaguely). I wish I had the talent of gushing, but I would sound far too fake.

1:18 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

You are right - she was dressed up to the nines just for early doors in the pub. I think she had her doubts actually.
I am very 'two faced' about presents - OOh it's just what I wanted etc!

5:51 pm  
Blogger The Poet Laura-eate said...

I've got a friend who picks up the most hideous-looking rags in shops and amazingly they always look stunning on her.

I don't know how she does it!

Re hair, I always find the compliment - 'Do you know I think it could be even better if it were a little more multi-tonal?'

The great thing about multi-tonal is that it is flattering on pretty well everyone and also if their hair is not as thick as it used to be or greying it will make it look thicker as well as far funkier/more youthful than a block colour (which can be actually be ageing.)

I can usually pay a tactful compliment while skirting round the real issue anyway. ;-)

10:11 pm  
Blogger Z said...

I think I'd have said that I just can't give shoulder pads a fair chance, as I so hate them on me and wish they hadn't come back into fashion (which is true) so I can't give tell how it suits her. Or else I'd say that it looks better on her than it would on me because I'm too small for shoulder pads.

Hair - I'd probably duck out and say it was fun and suited her outgoing personality. After all, if a hairstyle is outré enough you can get away with it - it's when it's *just* wrong that it's a mistake.

10:12 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

I think the idea of turning it back on yourself and your own ingrained likes and dislikes is a good one.
Too small?
Bet you're bigger than me.
The hairstyle was outré - but it was also très passé.

8:01 am  
Blogger Z said...

Indeed, I'm a bit of a porker, but with a small frame - "too small" was an abbreviated version of how I'd describe myself in the circs!

8:09 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

There's lots of different ways to be small isn't there. I shall refuse to think of you as 'a bit of a porker'.

Laura: (just spotted you there)
'multi-tonal' must remember that phrase.
Like your friend - Lesley used to look wonderful and original - but now she's stuck in a time warp.
Let this be a warning to you.

8:14 am  

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