Wimp

NOTE UPDATE in Comments.

I am a wimp, a drip, a wuss, a scaredy cat and a coward.

We can't find any birds in our usual habitats, so my unelected team leader (the one with the map reading skills) decided we should hike out into unknown parts.

This involved walking across a ............ rickety bridge ........ it wasn't traditionally scary like those on 'Indiana Jones' or 'I'm a Celebrity'.

It bore no resemblance to these either.

It was well built. But - there were gaps between the planks, it was high above a very wide, deep river and it squeaked alarmingly every time you put your foot down. But, I realised I was being pathetic as I saw women with big bottoms ride cheerfully past me on their bicycles.


I made it to the other side whereupon I hyperventilated, collapsed in an untidy heap and declared I could not go back.

So Vasco de Gama consulted his map and planned our return via route B.

This passed through a rather posh camp site where red breasted Nederlanders were reclining in various states of deshabille.

We got some suspicious looks as we trudged past with our boots and bins.

And I don't think this helped.

Then through the sewage works where my complaint was a bit of an advantage.

Later we faced a deep wide puddle. So we carried logs from a nearby field and built our own bridge. Just like 'The Famous Five'.

This was immensely enjoyable and made me long for "lashings of ginger beer".

So we rushed back to bar Platja in plenty of time to get pixelated.


KAZ