Sunday, November 15, 2009

Wait your Turn!

My female colleagues and I were in that pub on Ardwick Green having an animated chat while eating our sandwich and chips. A bloke walks past, stops in amazement, and says 'You're all talking at once ...... but you're listening as well".

Well now it's official.

Brain scans have recognised and explained it and I read about it in Stylist Magazine given free with the Manchester Evening News.


Men are unable to talk and listen at the same time.

You have to let them finish before you speak - unless you fall asleep before it's your turn. And it's also not always a lie when a bloke say "Nothing" in response to the dreaded question "What are you thinking about darling?"

Research on the male brain shows that they can turn it off completely.

They often turn it off during an argument.

So what have we learned today readers?

There is no future to the male - female relationship unless you have excellent sex and a good telly.

Or is this a pessimistic view?

KAZ

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38 Comments:

Blogger MJ said...

I find they don't have much to say when I'm sitting on their face.

6:30 pm  
Blogger Steve said...

Bugger. Time to get HD then.

6:58 pm  
Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

Sorry, what were you saying?

7:20 pm  
Anonymous NiC said...

Sadly, I was reading this post out loud and therefore have no idea what it said.

Doh!

7:21 pm  
Blogger Dave said...

I was going to say what Vicus said.

I have no original thoughts.

7:31 pm  
Blogger Geoff said...

Betty is able to talk about what's on the telly and watch it at the same time. My thumb goes straight for pause and rewind.

7:33 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

MJ:
Well this starts the comments off at the 'bottom'.
The tone can only get higher.

Steve:
Another pessimist.

Vicus:
"What were you thinking about darling?"

NiC:
Ha ha - next time try doing it silently without moving your lips.
I don't think the research covers that.

Dave:
But are you able to have 'no original thoughts' and talk at the same time.

Geoff:
Try the subtitles.

8:09 pm  
Blogger xl said...

"excellent sex and a good telly"

I'm having reception trouble with both.

8:11 pm  
Blogger Roses said...

You mean there are other reasons to be in a relationship?

That's obviously where I've been going wrong all these years.

8:18 pm  
Blogger savannah said...

i'll have to ask the MITM during half time, sugar! *snickering* xoxoxoox

9:14 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

xl:
Good thing you have your lovely pussies ..and the internet.

Roses:
Well NO - I didn't actually mean there was more.
They'll do for most of us.

Savannah:
I see you've read the post title "Wait your Turn".
Good luck.

9:40 pm  
Blogger I, Like The View said...

I wish I'd known this a few years ago. . .

. . .hang on, I think I did

I think we've all known all along

but only you are brave enough to bring it to our attention! (the sex and telly bit)

9:55 pm  
Blogger zIggI said...

does the excellent sex mean you don't have to wait for your turn?

10:14 pm  
Blogger garfer said...

Come again?

I wouldn't worry about it, we're a dying breed what with the decline of the Y chromosome and Y fronts.

Fenales, as we all know, are an excellent alternative to Sat Nav.

Strap Kate Moss to the roof of your Vauxhall Corsa and you'll never get lost again

10:52 pm  
Blogger geraldgee said...

You know you can fall out of love Kaz.....

11:19 pm  
Blogger dinahmow said...

What would researchers say about couples who combine sex AND telly? And what about the same-sex pairings? More research is needed!

1:20 am  
Blogger Z said...

My other half rarely listens to what I say and tries to hide it by saying "remind me what you're doing today" when he has an uncomfortable feeling that we've had several conversations on the subject but can't remember any of them. When we do discuss things he wants to talk about and we come to a conclusion, he'll later change his mind and not tell me or consult me again (Dave can bear witness to that).

He has very little interest in the television. However, I'm keeping him.

1:57 am  
Blogger Macy said...

Erm - is this NEWS???? Ah, hang on, MALE scientists have only just noticed! Suddenly it makes sense.

6:10 am  
Blogger Donn said...

Yeah so?

I know from experience and Psychology Today articles that Males cannot multitask...which would obviously include talking and listening.

Fran Liebowitz once said that the opposite of talking isn't listening, it's waiting!

I love the last photo!

7:15 am  
Blogger Roger said...

Sorry I'm late. I was doing up my shoe laces.

7:45 am  
Anonymous NiC said...

Reading without moving my lips?!?!?!? Not sure I'm up to that yet.

8:25 am  
Blogger Kerrie said...

Good Sex?? A good telly?? ( I am now making the noise from Family Fortunes X X )
I am doomed.

9:43 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

View:
'I think we've all known all along' - but feminists refused to accept it - or we'd not be given the important jobs.
We'd be considered too emotional.

zIggI:
Isn't excellent sex worth waiting for?

Garfer:
Kate Moss as a Sat Nav - very lateral thinking Garfer.
You should suggest that to your nasty bank manager.

Gerald:
But I still love you.

Dinah:
Same-sex pairings? Men talk in strict rotation. Women talk about feelings and listen to each other.
Fancy a date?

Z:
After reading your daily schedules - I have some sympathy for the Sage.
Better the devil you ...... etc. My motto as well.

Macy:
I find it surprising that men can genuinely think of nothing at all.
I'm trying to do it myself.

Donn:
Fran had a good point.
We haven't all been on listening skills courses - so we just wait our turn to talk.
The last photo is the story of my life.
hat

Rog:
For goodness sake.
Get some flip flops or ask Lily to help.

NiC:
Even Wayne Rooney can do that.

Kerrie:
But you have your dancing - non verbal communication and no sign of Les Dennis.

10:34 am  
Blogger mago said...

I can only do one thing at a time. Drink OR talk.

2:31 pm  
Blogger BEAST said...

Personally ,I have always put the fabled female "multitasking" mularkey down to flitter brained lack of concentration
***runs away very quickly"

11:38 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Mago:
Excellent.
When I've been drinking - I find talking always gets me into trouble.

Beast:
* Come back*
It's all terminology anyway and amounts to much the same ...... now what was I saying?

1:17 pm  
Blogger dh said...

Too much sex here. I'll look in later.

7:35 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

dh:
There'll be a much more sex 'later'.

8:03 pm  
Blogger Kevin Musgrove said...

I had this really bazzing comment but then I registered the idea of Kate Moss strapped down and...




...sorry, where was I?

9:23 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Your comments are always bazzing Kevin.

10:25 pm  
Blogger The Poet Laura-eate said...

Well that's pretty useful. I salute you for these wise words.

11:08 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

Thanks Laura - substitute glib for wise and you may have a point.

9:44 am  
Blogger Flaming Nora said...

On some days when the wind blows in the right direction, I find myself being able to walk, talk and breathe all at the same time. Quite remarkable really for a woman of my stature.

12:27 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

WOW!
Now that's what I call multi tasking.

2:18 pm  
Blogger tony said...

I can only get BBC's 1&2.Channel 4 & ITV.Channel 5 is really fuzzy.I'm Buggered!

11:32 am  
Blogger KAZ said...

Tony:
Buggered - so the sex is OK then?

8:44 am  
Blogger nwtrunner said...

Well, that explains my situation then. No sex and we get bugger-all on the telly because we just have the 'cheapy' cable package. Only thing I watch on telly these days is football, and that would be the American/Canadian version thereof and not the game the rest of the world plays.

And now I've got to go and do some thinking about MJ's comment....

7:26 pm  
Blogger KAZ said...

NWTR:
Don't get too excited about MJ's face sitting activities.
Tellies are essentially for watching football (soccer of course) and DVDs of Mad Men.

5:56 pm  

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