Are you GREEN?

Isn't the word schadenfreude brilliant?

It means *malicious pleasure in the misfortunes of others* and I'm sure you know why I chose the above picture.

I regularly indulge in a bit of shadenfreude without any guilt feelings whatsoever.

But Envy is different. I hate myself when I feel jealous.
I feared I might be jealous of Friend B and her glittering dinner parties. Then I read in Cosmopolitan that you are only truly jealous of a person if you would like to swap places.

Yikes! I was cured instantly.

Philip Larkin had been a pal of Kingsley Amis at Oxford ......

........ but Kingsley seemed to have much more success in later life.

I think Philip preferred his little fat hairy friend.

Larkin writes to a friend in 1958 .... Kingsley's appearance on Network 3 on Jazz (the first of 6 programmes) has had its obvious effect on me.

"I am a corpse eaten out with envy, impotence, failure, envy, boredom, sloth, snobbery, envy, incompetence, inefficiency, laziness, lechery. envy, fear, baldness, bad circulation, bitterness, envy, sycophancy, deceit, nostalgia etcetera."

G'won Phil don't hold back.

And why should Sven?

KAZ

Sid and Nancy

I still can't believe that Sven is running Man City - the Everton of Manchester.

Man City supporters are just common lads from Burnage and Gorton - not millionaires from California and Australia.

But what about the glamorous Nancy? It would be like asking Sophia Loren to live in Wolverhampton.

So far (according to the Manchester Evening News) Nancy is swanning about between London and Rome while Sven is in Manchester living the bachelor life.

If I knew his address I could go round and cheer him up.

'Ulrika' and 'her off Celeb big brother' weren't mentioned. Nancy doesn't seem to be too concerned about the movements of her perfidious, two timing, randy boyfriend.

However, last week Nancy made her first visit up 'ere - to visit - wait for it - Rochdale!! Wearing killer heels she kicked off a footie game at a local college.

Sven was conveniently at an away game down South.

The body language in this photo (esp. his left hand) suggests that Sven might prefer this arrangement.

KAZ

Another Walk on the Tame side

Remember when we took a walk on the Tame side in February (see archive if you have time on your hands). Many of you took my advice and spent your summer hols there.

This is the second part of our journey for those who fancy a late autumn break.

Here's an old friend to wish us 'Bon Voyage'. I suppose Man City was paying for all these ads.

You will find gourmet restaurants with traditional English dishes.

Choose from a wide selection of drinks lagers to accompany your meal..

Be assured that your security is of paramount importance to us.

Hello - what's NiC doing here? Now we know where he finds all that wonderful wild life.
Thrill to the Rabelaisian delights of the Tunnel of Love. Here's where you can experience a famous 'Tameside Knee Trembler'.

More high diving facilities.


Fancy a punt (that's Punt)? Can anyone tell me why the weeping willow doesn't grow long enough to dip into the water?

It just seems to stop on the surface.

And finally the retail therapy you were all waiting for....

KAZ