Danny Boy

So what made Manchester famous? What springs to mind when you hear the word Manchester?

Cotton?
Canals?
Coronation St?
Cycling?

Could it be the Peterloo massacre?

Probably it’s The Hacienda, New order or Oasis.

These days it’s Pies. Apparently sales of Holland’s pies are soaring as consumers turn to value-for-money food during the recession.

Wigan is where they eat them. A Wigan kebab is 6 meat pies on a skewer!

Kate Winslet used to eat pies.

But bugger Winslet - what about our Danny from Radcliffe near Manchester eh?

8 Oscars for Slumdog - beat that!

Radcliffe is the sort of the Lancashire town that time forgot. It makes Oldham seem like New York. There was an Oscar night celebration in St Mary’s Club Radcliffe where Danny’s dad celebrated with a bacon butty.

Who’d a thowt it?
KAZ

Addiction

Do you need a crutch (no not a crotch) to get you through the day? Apart from the Sauvignon and espressos I have another strange addiction.

It started years ago when we were going through a bad patch at work - everyone in the department was hooked. Students, marking and lesson preparation were all shamefully neglected.

I do it first thing in the morning, several times during the day and usually last thing at night. But last week it was cruelly taken away and I had to go cold turkey.

Why?

The kind insurance people sent me a new computer to replace my lap top which had met with an accident - the usual thing but it was water not coffee and clumsiness not LOLing.

It’s a beautiful VAIO with everything a girl could want including Windows Vista Professional ………………………………................ BUT NO FREECELL !!

They don’t do a download from Microsoft, the online versions were excruciatingly slow and had terrible graphics and I couldn’t buy it in the Arndale.

I love Zoo Keeper (thanks Lubin) but it’s just not as comforting.

After hours searching the web I found a letter from a nerd which said :-
'Here is how you do it.

Get onto a computer running windows XP.
Search and copy these five files onto a disk or thumb drive:
CARDS.DLL
FREECELL.CHM
FREECELL.chw
FREECELL.EXE
FREECELL.HLP

On a computer running XP, these can be found in the following folders: C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM32
FREECELL.EXE and CARDS.DLL

C:\WINDOWS\Help
FREECELL.CHM and FREECELL.chw and FREECELL.HLP

Copy these five files into the machine running Vista.
e.g.C:\Program Files\FreecellXP
Make a shortcut to C:\Program Files\FreecellXP\FREECELL.EXE'

So - I borrowed Kev’s XP laptop and I did it.


Aren't I clever?

Have you got a crutch that gets you through the day?

KAZ

PAXO

Did you see Jeremy this week? No - not University challenge which I have to watch so I can say – ‘Ooh well done Kev’ - but his prog on 'The Victorians’.

In Manchester we are surrounded by 'What the Victorians did for us' and I have to admit that this programme made me a bit proud to be from Manchester by reminding me about the terrific architecture of our town hall and the pre Raphaelites in the City Art Gallery.

Ford Maddox Brown's ‘Work’ is a magnificent tribute to the importance of manual labour. The best thing is that you can just pop in for a look on the way to the bus – entrance is totally free.. still one thing we Brits can be truly proud of.

We now have our very own Antony Gormley. I went to see it yesterday. Here it is with the man himself.

Not quite as good as the Angel of the North or the Another Place installation at Crosby which we saw again last week.

[Click to enlarge – can you spot 5 figures and and lots of waders?]

But it will have to do - because our B of the Bang at the Manchester City stadium must be taken down for good (elfin safety). Bits keep falling off.

I now know why we saw Jeremy in Market Street last summer on our way back from seeing The Dark Knight - I gave him a little smile and he smiled back (blush)

He was filmed walking along with a typical urban crowd. If I'd been 5 minutes earlier you would have seen me on the telly.

Damn.

KAZ

Fashion Victims

While driving to Tameside yesterday morning (yes I do have an exciting life don't I?) … I found myself asking:

WHY …..

..do girls with vast bottoms wear skin tight jeans?

..do girls with fat legs choose mini skirts?

..do shortarsed girls walk in completely flat pumps (or are they plimsolls) when their tall mates wear killer heels?

..do massively bosomed girls wear huge smocks which make them look like a tent with two boy scouts fighting inside?

..do girls with bulging middles wear skimpy tops and low slung bottoms?

I suppose it's about the human spirit.

It's the same reason we eat too much chocolate cake when we know we'll get fat or have another pint when we know we'll feel suicidal in the morning.

We straighten our curly hair and perm our straight hair.

We scratch those mosquito bites knowing it'll make them worse.

We say yes when we should say no.

In other words we don't know how to be satisfied.

And that's good … isn't it ?

KAZ

Supergig

In spite of the fact that Kev is my younger man, I often feel like the kid in the Werther’s Originals advert who has to listen to his grandpa.

The conversation goes something like this:

Kev: Did I ever tell you about the fourth time I saw The Stones at Scunthorpe Working Men’s Club – the one with the contortionist and the dancing dog on the bill?

Kaz: Probably.

However, the other night for some strange reason I asked – ‘Which was your favourite Hendrix gig?’

‘Oh it was definitely the one in Lincoln with Floyd, Cream and Geno Washington on the bill.

I was impressed.

But his memories were rather vague – so I googled it when I got home.

Here’s the poster – all for £1- pay on the door.

What a line up.

I know the Glastonbury list sometimes looks impressive but it takes 5 days, you have to take out a mortgage for the ticket, tent and transport, rub shoulders with bankers and supermodels and catch hypothermia.

I also found some other brilliant (and surprising) posters.

Led Zeppelin and Jimi?

The Monkees and Jimi?

The Doors and Jimi? .... and Miles Davis!

And - who fancies Englebert and Jimi?

Finally - Is this a gig to dye for?

I was wondering what my dream gig would be. I don’t want to see a geriatric Led Zep or an ageing Madonna and I’m much too cool to go and see Take That.

So I’d be a bit stumped for ideas.

KAZ

Cohabitation

Kev and I are not married.

This site is spreading malicious rumours to the contrary.

Neither do we cohabit - except on holiday (I know I know).

After 8 years of sharing a house in the late 80s and early 90s we split in anger. Then we made up. The new arrangement worked very well.

Some of my friends have unconventional lifestyles.
Friend C (posh and skint) lives with her ex boyfriend. He took her back as an economic expedient. She has other partners for sex - he can’t be bothered.

Friend A and Ron (married last year) share sex, a posh apartment and glittering chandeliers - but not a bedroom.

So what are the advantages of having your own front door? Well there’s the obvious ones like control of the remote, the drink and the duvet.

I have no wish to share my space with 4 guitars, 3 bikes and too many sweaty socks. Even a talented guitarist (Kev?) doesn’t sound great when practising the same riff over and over at midnight.


But it’s the subtleties that seem to be important.
It’s quite tiring always having to worry about offending or ignoring your partner or being offended or ignored by him.

Is it alright if I just....?
Will you be OK if I just …?
I’m just going to the …… back about …
I’m meeting friend B later - won’t be late.
Well yes - we’ll watch Dave all night if you really want to.

Sometimes you just want to check your blog, stare at the wall or sit for 3 hours in front of a film that a simple bloke would not appreciate.

But there have been recent changes to the living arrangements - NO don’t be daft - we aren’t going to cohabit.

KAZ